Sunday, April 23, 2017

A Faithful Helper




Jadi hari ini nyokap lagi ga enak badan. Pilek batuk dan tidur seharian. Sebagaimana emak-emak pada umumnya yang selalu berusaha menghidangkan santapan nikmat bagi anak-anaknya, demikianlah nyokap gue setiap harinya. Tapi ya krn ibu lg ga enak badan maka tak ada makanan yang terhidang.

Dan juga sebagaimana insan manusia yang sudah tidak dapat menahan terjangan lapar di siang hari, maka gue memutuskan untuk masak. (Ga ding, sebenarnya krn gue ditodong buat masak wkwkw)

Dengan kemampuan masak gue yang luar biasa busuknya ini, nyokap tiba-tiba bangkit dari tidur panjangnya dan menghampiri gue yang sedang menghancurkan dapur dengan pare dan kikil dimana-mana. (Ga ding ini lebay wkwk)

"Bu, udah tidur aja. Hna bisa kok"
"Ibu udah beres tidurnya"
"Udah bu mending ibu tid.."
(Pisau ada di leher) "IBU UDAH BERES TIDURNYA"

(Hahaha ga kok, ga ada adegan pisau di leher)
(TAPI KENAPA GUE NULIS JADI LEBAY GINI DAH)

Intinya nyokap ttp kekeh bantuin gue masak (atau lebih tepatnya berganti jd gue yg bantuin doi masak)

Somehow ketika adegan masak memasak itu beres gue jd inget satu pribadi: Roh Kudus. (Ciye rohani bet ya gue)

Roh Kudus (RK) adl roh Penolong. Tidak hanya menolong kita untuk ngingetin hal2 yg TY ajarkan tp gue juga percaya RK juga jd penolong kita dalam segala sesuatu.

Yohanes 14:26
..yaitu Roh Kudus, yang akan diutus oleh Bapa dalam nama-Ku, Dialah yang akan mengajarkan segala sesuatu kepadamu dan akan mengingatkan kamu akan semua yang telah Kukatakan kepadamu.

Kalo ibu aja begitu selfless-nya mau menolong gue anaknya apalagi RK yang diberikanNya bagi kita sebagai Penolong.

Sebenarnya bisa aja ibu meninggalkan gue masak sendiri krn toh gue udah gede tp emang karena naturnya seorang 'ibu' makanya dia kekeh mau bantuin gue. Sama juga dengan RK. Dia begitu selfless-nya (dan bahkan terlalu setia) menolong kita dalam segala sesuatu krn memang Dia adalah Penolong.

Di banyak kesempatan RK sering menolong gue dengan cara ngingetin ini itu.. yang banyak diantaranya adl hal-hal yang remeh. Ngingetin utk sikat gigi malem. Ngingetin kalo ada berkas ketinggalan ketika pergi. Ngingetin berdoa sebelum beraktivitas. Ngingetin ayat ketika ketemu situasi tertentu. Atau kasih kesan di hati "kynya gue mesti kesini deh.. atau kesana.. atau pake kendaraan ini.. dan pake baju itu.." dimana endingnya selalu berakhir dengan kemujuran.

Kita sebagai manusia sering mikir "ya elah lo udah gede kali.. masa hal-hal remeh gitu masih perlu 'intervensi' illahi?" Tp namanya juga Roh Penolong maka memang naturNya adl menolong kita (believers).

Dalam hari-hari gue, seriiiiiiing banget gue diingetin, ditolong dan diarahin yang ujungnya bener2 divine banget.. dimana terlihat kalo tanpa intervensi RK, kondisi itu bs berakhir buruk.

"Dialah yang akan mengajarkan segala sesuatu."

Betapa bersyukurnya gue bisa bertemu dengan Roh Kudus. Pribadi yang besar tapi yang peduli juga dengan hal2 kecil dalam keseharian kita. Menolong dan menghibur dalam segala sesuatu.

Let us be thankful that God is always on our side by giving us His Holy Spirit to help and guide us in every step of our lives :)

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Memilih Direktur Utama PT DKI Jakarta, Tbk


Pilkada DKI Jakarta udah tinggal menghitung hari. Eh ga hari ding.. bahkan udah tinggal hitungan jam! Countdown to Feb 15th!!!

Pertarungan paslon gubernur dan wakil gubernur DKI Jakarta ini emang heboh pisan. Rasanya udah kaya pilpres aja. Ya kebayang sih, orang-orang yang maju ini adalah tokoh-tokoh berkaliber nasional dan bahkan dengan dukungan para elite politik. Pilkada Jakarta udah bukan cuman sekedar konsumsi rakyat Jakarta aja, tapi juga jadi konsumsi nasional. Gue cuman berharap orang daerah ga jadi lupa sama paslon pemimpin daerahnya sendiri.


Jakarta ini emang kompleks permasalahannya, karena kalo kita ngomongin Jakarta, Jakarta itu ga cuman sekedar 1 dari 33 provinsi di Indonesia aja, tapi Jakarta adalah ibukota dari negara Indonesia. Jakarta sebagai ibukota bisa jadi representasi negara Indonesia dan tentu dong kita ga mau negara kita kalah dengan negara lain. Pastinya kita pengen Jakarta bisa makin maju dan Indonesia bisa makin dipandang juga sama orang asing.

Makanya mengurus Jakarta ini juga butuh orang yang tepat. Kalo aja kita analogikan, paslon gubernur dan wakil gubernur ini layaknya pelamar kerja yang lagi melamar posisi direksi sebuah perusahaan. 

Mengutip istilah pak Anies nih, ijinkan saya (sok-sok-an) menganalisa paslon pilkada Jakarta dalam proses rekrutmen selama kurleb 4 bulan ini.

**

1.  Pasangan Calon Nomor Satu (you know their names lah)


Kalo gue analogikan, calon nomor 1 ini layaknya anak jurusan Sastra Inggris yang lagi coba apply lowongan Dirut Bank. Ga nyambung. Tapi berhubung bapaknya ini pernah menjabat di bank, ya didoronglah anaknya buat ikutan. Ya biasa lah anak kan biasa jadi proyeksi keinginan bapaknya (yang masih ngebet berkuasa). Si mas nomor 1 ini sebenarnya bisa menolak, tapi mungkin mereka menganut budaya wong jowo yang manut aja apa kata bapaknya (Asal Bapak Senang gitu.. eh kaya pernah denger di debat kemaren yak wkwk). 

Namanya juga lulusan Sastra Inggris ya, kebayang pas sesi wawancara. Banyakan ngomong istilah-istilang ngenggres dibanding substansinya. Yang penting goodwill (1). Padahal goodwill itu (setau saya) adalah aset yang kudu di-amortisasi (misal: paten). Saya sendiri bingung maksud goodwill itu apa. Oh.. membangun tanpa menggusur katanya. Tapi kalo goodwill yang dimaksud membangun tanpa menggusur dan orang-orang bantaran kali + pinggir kereta tetap tinggal di sana dengan risiko kecelakaan tinggi.. saya juga jadi tetep bingung sama definisi goodwill-nya.

Yang penting juga katanya kreativitas. Tapi pas diwawancara lebih dalem contoh kreativitasnya, tetep aja ga ada substansi yang bisa dikemukakan. Orang HR sama User kan jadi bingung gimana menilainya. Oh.. katanya bukan menggusur, tapi menggeser (2). Pewawancara kemudian melihat skema "penggeseran" yang diusulkan paslon ini. Kok mirip kaya mainan The Sims ya? Geser sana, geser sini tanpa memperhitungkan bagaimana praktik lapangan yang ril.

Nah, biasanya ada tuh sesi focus group discussion (FGD) pas lagi proses rekrutmen, Sesi FGD adalah sesi dimana para pelamar dikasih sebuah kasus dan bagaimana sang pelamar bisa mengajukan alternatif solusi untuk kasus tersebut. Kebayang ya kalo calon nomor 1 ini lagi sesi FGD. Selain banyak istilah enggresnya, solusi juga mungkin agak sulit untuk tepat sasaran (karena backgroundnya beda). Daripada pusing, udah aja uang yang jadi solusi (3). Karyawan minta kenaikan gaji: KASIH UANG! Karyawan minta tunjangan rumah: KASIH UANG! Karyawan minta tunjangan ke luar negeri; KASIH UANG! Pokoknya kasih uang buat semua... tanpa mikirin gimana kondisi keuangan perusahaan.

Asal semua senang, senyum terkembang. Mau perusahaan bangkrut juga tak jadi soal.

Belum lagi calon nomor 1 ini tidak memperhitungkan resiko korupsi dari program bagi-bagi uangnya. Katanya "pemimpin jangan curiga pada rakyat" (*). Lah pak, menteri lulusan terbaik aja kalah sama gepokan duit, gimana rakyat kecil yang jarang pegang uang banyak? Coba baca-baca lagi materi risk mitigation dari kelas risk management.

Orang HR dan User pun mengernyitkan dahi.

2.  Pasangan Calon Nomor Dua (If you don't know their names.. maaf Anda WNI bukan?)


Yang nomor 2 bisa dibilang seperti dirut yang lagi dinilai ulang sama asesor. Apakah masih layak lagi jadi dirut di perusahaan atau enggak. Apalagi ada omongan dr org HR, ada 2 pasangan nih yang lagi melamar untuk posisi dirut.

Calon nomor 2 ini emang urusannya bukan lagi sm HR rekrutmen, tapi sama User yang jadi Asesor langsung. Bahkan sampe pake 360 degree assessment. Semua stakeholders bener-bener menilai. Sampe omongan pun dinilai. Wah emang gawat sih sama calon nomor 2. Soalnya emang doi kalo ngomong kagak disaring. Yang bener dia bilang bener, yang salah dibilang salah. A adalah A. B adalah B. Jujur. Ga pake pencitraan. Makanya nih, orang nomor 2 ini lagi kena kasus gara-gara omongannya yang.. terlalu jujur itu. Bahwa memang benar banyak oknum yang ngomong politik dengan dalih iman.

Tapi asesor tentu ga cuman sekedar menilai lisan. Mereka juga menilai kinerja. Betapa kita lupa, selama masa kampanye ini, Jakarta itu hujan terus. Ga abis-abis. Sering juga hujannya super deras. Tapi sampai sekarang belum juga kita lihat Jakarta tenggelem seperti saat lampau (4(Red: saya tinggal di area Barat yang biasanya kalo hujan awal tahun, jalan sekitar Lapangan Bola, Pejuangan, Taman Aries udah kaya lautan, tapi sekarang udah ga pernah banjir lagi!!!!).  Bis Transjakarta udah banyak banget armadanya dan koridor pun makin diperluas (memanggil seluruh karyawan Jakarta, can you hear this??). Taman kota (RPTRA) juga makin diperbanyak sehingga Jakarta ga cuman sekedar kota polusi yang ga punya pohon tapi juga menjadi kota yang makin hijau (5). Pemerataan ekonomi juga semakin terasa dengan KJP (pendidikan bisa meningkatkan harkat hidup loh) dan KJS (semua orang bisa dapet akses kesehatan dengan terjangkau) (6). Proyek MRT dan LRT jelas akan dikerjakan dan dikembangkan (7).

Tapi yang terpenting adalah bagaimana calon nomor 2 ini memegang prinsip. Jelas dia teguh pada prinsipnya: Bersih, Transparan dan Profesional. Tekanan yang banyak tidak menggoyahkan prinsip yang dia pegang dari sejak jaman masih menjabat anggota DPR: untuk anti pada praktik KKN (8). Mengatakan benar untuk hal yang benar, dan salah untuk hal yang salah. Berani pegang prinsip pada demokrasi meski mengharuskannya untuk keluar dari keanggotaan partai (9). Teguh pada prinsip untuk mengadministrasi keadilan sosial meski pesaing berusaha merebut suara dengan bagi-bagi uang.  

Kalo kamu perhatiin dari video-video jadul, calon nomor 2 ini omongannya sama ampe sekarang. Blas sama. Ini artinya, sebagai pemangku kepentingan, koko yang satu ini berintegritas dan tak goyah dibawah tekanan. Menjadi poin penting sekali bagi tim asesor.

User pun ga dibuat garuk-garuk kepala deh.

3.  Pasangan Calon Nomor Tiga (Of course you know their names)


Calon gub nomor 3 ini sebenarnya bisa dibilang pujaan banyak naq muda di Indonesia. Siapa sih yang gatau gerakan Indonesia Mengajar? Urun Tangan?

Tapi kalo kita lihat dari kacamata rekrutmen, calon nomor 3 ini agak nyeremin. Jawaban hasil psikotes kok beda sama hasil wawancara. FGD pun juga beda lagi (hayoloh). Waktu lagi psikotes, terlihat grafik kepemimpinannya kok baguus sekali. Cocok jadi sosok yang menginsipirasi. Tapi pas dikorek lebih dalem pas interview panel... walah kok beda. Ketegangan dan tekanan saat interview panel kan pasti lebih tajem tuh dibanding saat ngerjain psikotes, nah ternyata si bapak ini ga tahan sama tekanannya (atau mungkin memang baru terlihat karakter aslinya pas interview? idk).

Mungkin yang ada di pikirannya "Orang-orang yang mengutus saya sampe ke sesi ini pengen saya lolos dan diterima.. belum lagi saya pun juga ngebet banget ambil jabatan ini" jadi wes semua prinsip-prinsip yang dipegang pas psikotes, dilepas semua. 

Kalo dulu, semua bisa menjadi penggerak bangsa, terlepas apapun keyakinan yang dianut dan ras yang dimilikinya.. oh sekarang udah ga bisa. Kalo dulu, orang baik pasti didukung orang baik.. oh sekarang berbeda (9). Kalo dulu, sentimen agama bisa merusak tenun kebangsaan.. oh sekarang sah-sah aja bermain di ranah iman (10).

Intinya, ganti-ganti prinsip itu sah-sah aja. Wah padahal bahaya tuh kalo dalam jabatan tinggi bisa semudah itu mengganti prinsip. Kalo misal perusahaan berprinsip memakai sistem ramah lingkungan dalam mengurus limbah, tapi karena dirutnya tergiur dengan profit, berarti bisa dong mereka mengganti sistem dengan yang tdk ramah lingkungan? Andaikan perusahaan berprinsip untuk terus melakukan CSR tapi lagi-lagi karena tergiur dengan profit maka CSR bisa dong dibatalkan, dan masyarakat ga lagi menerima imbal positif dari kehadiran perusahaan tersebut di lingkungannya. Sebagai seorang pemangku kepentingan, prinsip itu penting, dan kekeuh dengan prinsip juga sangat penting. Orang yang gampang berubah prinsipnya itu ga bisa jadi pemegang jabatan tertinggi. Apalagi yang ga sanggup tetap teguh dengan prinsip karena pengaruh tekanan. Dirut mah kudu sanggup, makanya banyak pada botak kan (wkwk)

Lain lagi saat FGD. Sebelumnya saat seleksi administrasi dilihat CVnya. Wah lulusan luar negeri nih. Mantan pemimpin organisasi skala nasional. Inisiator gerakan nasional. Lah tapi pas FGD, ketika kasus transportasi mencuat, usulannya banyakin subsidi angkot (11). Gimana tah? Masa Jepang, Singapura, dan negara maju lain udah punya MRT-LRT, kita masih ngangkot muter-muter komplek? Trus lagi saat kasus FGDnya tentang kemacetan malah membatasi mobil mewah (12). Padahal yang muter-muter di jalanan mereknya Avanza-Xenia bukan Lamborghini-Ferari. Biar jadi efek kejut katanya? Orang HR jadi garuk-garuk kepala deh.

Tambah lagi ketika sesi lanjutan FGD tentang perumahan, usulannya adalah beri rumah dengan DP 0% (13). Wah, lahan Jakarta padetnya udah kaya lapis legit. Gimana bisa ketemu lahan besar untuk penduduk Jakarta yang lebih banyak dari negara Singapura ini? Belum lagi usulan DP 0% membuat cicilan makin besar. Nyicil rumah susun aja udah engap, apalagi nyicil rumah. Belum lagi resiko meningkatnya besaran NPL.

User jadi bingung kok CVnya beda sama jawaban FGD ya? Pegangan deh usernya karena bingung.

**

Intinya, wahai rakyat Jakarta, pilihlah untuk kebaikan kota, bukan hanya untuk kebaikan kantong kamu. Pilihlah untuk kemajuan bangsa, bukan hanya untuk kemajuan golongan kamu.

Dan jangan golput ya.

Karena suara kamu menentukan 
apakah KJP & KJS dilanjutkan atau tidak,
apakah Jakarta mau tetap kering seperti sekarang atau tenggelam seperti waktu lampau,
apakah Jakarta bisa diperbaiki untuk menjadi kota yang nyaman huni atau tidak.

Karena suara kamu menentukan terselesainya pembangunan kota Jakarta.

Saturday, April 23, 2016

The Way To Be Saved (C.H. Spurgeon)

The Way To Be Saved
Charles Spurgeon



The way to be saved is to come to Christ. Christ is a person, a living person, full of power to save. He has not placed his salvation in sacraments, or books, or priests, but he has kept it in himself; and if you want to have it you must come to him. He is still the one source and fountain of eternal mercy. There is no getting it by going round about him, or only going near to him: you must come to him, actually to him, and there must be a personal contact established between the Lord Jesus and your spirit. Of course it cannot be a natural contact, for his body is in the heavens and we are here; but it must be a spiritual contact, by which your mind, heart, thought, shall come to Christ, and faith, like a hand, shall touch him spiritually, grasp him by believing upon him, and receive life and grace from his divine power.

Just as when the woman of old touched his garment’s hem, the virtue went out of him to her, and she was healed; so now, though he be yonder, faith’s long hand can touch his divine and human person, by confiding, trusting, and resting in him, and so virtue will flow from him into our soul, (body), and our mind shall be healed of whatsoever disease it hath.

Come as a person to the Person of Christ

Saturday, April 2, 2016

Man of Steel Movie-- a Reflection of What?

Superman Parallels Jesus in 11 Ways

I went to the theatres this week to watch the new Superman movie, and it was incredible for so many reasons. My eyes were glued to the screen but my mind was racing on overdrive. How the plotline, characters, and quotes paralleled with Christianity was simply too compelling to not believe that there was some kind of theological influence while the story was being composed. Superman truly represented and embodied Jesus: he was and is the heroic figure that the metanarratives of heaven and earth prophesied about and anticipated as their savior from all the forces of evil.
The resemblance was incredibly striking, whether you are a Christian or not. In this blog, I want to outline a number of parallels between Superman, the savior figure, and Jesus, the human savior.
Here are some main ones that came to mind:
1. Other-worldly conflict—the movie starts off with a conflict of power in Krypton, the heavenly realm. General Zod, wanting total power of the planet, gathers a number of natives from the planet to confront and overthrow the leaders of Krypton, mainly Jor-el, Superman’s Father. General Zod and his forces fail, however, and are damned to an eternity of punishment. For a time though, they roam about in the universe aiming to disrupt the plans of the Jor-el.
Similarly, the Bible describes a metanarrative of other-worldly conflict where Lucifer—who was the highest ranking angel in God’s kingdom—desires total power like God and leads a war upon God’s establishment. Lucifer takes a 1/3 of the angels from heaven with him in this endeavor, and while they ultimately fail and are damned for eternity, they nonetheless strive to thwart and disrupt the plans of God. (Heb 12:22; Rev 12:3-9).
2. The name of Superman, Kal-El, is actually a Hebrew word, transliterated as “Voice of God”. Similarly, Jesus is referred to as “the Word of God” (Jn. 1; Heb. 1; Col. 1).
In addition, Jor-el also has spiritual meaning because “El” in Hebrew means “God”—however, I’m not going to act like I know anymore Hebrew than “El”, so I don’t know what ‘Jor’ means. I have seen in some sources that it refers to Jehovah, but in others, it was something different.
3. Furthermore, in the back-story of the conflict in Krypton—before Superman comes on the scene—Jor-el encodes the codex, which contains all possibility of life in the heavenly realms, into the blood of Kal-el, Superman.
Similarly, Christianity holds the same notion for life and salvation—that it is only found in the blood of the Son of God. (Lev. 17:11; Rom. 3:23-25, 5:9; Jn. 6:53-56; Acts 20:28; Eph. 1:7, 2:13; Col. 1:20; Heb. 10:19; 11:28, 12:24, 13:20; 1 Jn. 1:7).
4. Jor-el sent Kal-el to Earth knowing that humanity would reject him, but he did it anyway because it was the only way. In the same way, God sent Jesus to save the world all the while knowing that the world would nevertheless reject him. (Mt. 41:22; Mk. 8:31; Lk. 17:25; Jn. 1:10-11; 15:18-19)
5. Clark Kent waited until the “appointed time” to save the world, at which point he was 33 years old. Similarly, Jesus began proclaiming his lordship and saviorship when he was 30, but actually made atoning salvation for the world when he was 33.  (Lk. 3:23)
6. Jor-el commissioned Kal-el to be the “bridge between two peoples”. In response, Kal-el agreed, stated “I will save them”, and then fell out of the space shuttle in the shape of a cross. Similarly, Jesus was commissioned by the Father to be the bridge between God and humanity—the mediator of heaven and earth—through the saving power of reconciliation by the cross. (Eph. 2:15-16; Rom. 5:11; 2 Co. 5:18-19)
7. Jor-el said that it was necessary for Kal-el to go to earth so that he could truly relate to humanity, knowing and experiencing their sufferings, as that would qualify him to be their adequate leader and savior. Similarly, Jesus was Son of Man and Son of God—both humanly and other-worldly—that he might be able to truly relate to us, knowing and experiencing our sufferings, so that he would be qualified as our perfect mediator, leader, and savior. (Heb. 2:9-14; 4:15-16)
8. When General Zod went to destroy Superman and Earth, he erected two giant, magnetic devices on opposite sides of the planet to pulsate a new atmospheric composition and level of gravity—fundamentally reversing the natural order of earth, and making it more like his own dark kingdom. In the same way, the curse of sin under Satan’s rule reverses the natural order of creation—making life morally corruptible and the cosmos inhospitably inhumane. (Gen. 1-3; Eph. 2; Mk. 2:15; Rev. 12:9)
9. The symbol on Superman’s chest “S” actually stands for ‘hope’ in his worldly context. Likewise, Jesus stands as the only hope for humanity, and the clearest picture of that hope is emblazoned on his stretched frame as he hung at the intersection of the cross, the final junction of justice and peace. (Eph. 2:13-16; Acts 4:12; Jn. 14:6; 1 Jn. 2:2)
10. At the end of the movie, an American general tells Superman that they cannot be sure they can trust him. Superman responds that he is one of them—born and raised alongside them—and that his rescuing of them proves he is for them. But ultimately, they must trust his authority over them is good by remembering his rescue of them was good.
In the same way, Jesus rules with all deserving authority, and we can trust that his authority over us is good because his rescue of us was good. Indeed, Jesus’ suffering for and rescuing of us proves He is for us—this enables us to humbly submit to his authority and know that it is good. (Col. 1:15-20, Mt. 28:18-20, Rom. 8:28-36)
11. Louis Lane, the famous news reporter, has no connection to Mary Magdalene. I asked the director about this, you can trust me, ha. But if anything, Louis Lane resembles the church, the bride of Christ, who is collectively called to participate in his mission byspreading the news of the saving work of Christ to the world. Christians are news reporters—not saviors.
The list of these eleven parallels, of course, is not exhaustive in the least. The movie teems with probably hundreds of examples. In fact, I heard that a theologian wrote a 9-page review of the director’s script about the theological parallels evident in the screenplay. Pretty crazy.  
But most of all, I think it is important to note that certain types of stories resonate with all people for a reason—meaning, those feelings are not arbitrary, but hardwired in our DNA. The storyline of a universal problem and a universal conflict and a universal hero to conquer the evil and set things right can be observed in the most classic and popular works of all time—Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Harry Potter, Narnia, etc to scratch the surface. And they are classics for a reason—they resonate with us in a particular way for somepeculiar reason—almost as if we sense deep down that there is a universal problem, universal conflict, and a universal longing for a universal savior.
Even seeing an underdog team pull out a win and triumph over the most incredible odds strikes an innate chord of joy somewhere deep in us—that’s what happens in the gospel, and I believe it was what we were designed for—to revel in the story of God’s victory for us, ransoming us from sin, Satan, and death. And every time we experience a story similar to the gospel here on earth, it gives us a sweet taste of that deeper, richer, and fuller story we were designed to know and are living in—one that surpasses the half-inch thickness of a screen, or the momentary ecstasy of a sports highlight.
Superman is a reflection of the gospel. Let his fictional story serve to tell a greater story—God’s.


Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Stepping out of your Bell Jar

Please pray to your Heavenly Father if you feel so hopeless and helpless with your situations,
and do some blog-walking (in right blog-neighbours, of course).

You never know what you'll find. Like now.

Repost from graceunited.sg

Be blessed :)

___


Stepping out of your Bell Jar


I used to be depressed. I was depressed for a long time.
In fact, when my Husband first met me, I told him, “If you want to know me, watch ‘The Hours’.” I identified with the female protagonists in the film- those who walked the day to day with a dreary heart.
I used to pen poems in my teens and when I studied abroad, a German friend told me that my poems reminded me of Sylvia Plath’s. I was a frog in a well then who didn’t read so much poetry as I did write them. I found Plath’s poems and realised how much we were pieces of each other.
Sylvia Plath famously described herself as being trapped under a Bell Jar that she could never escape from. I used to identify with that because of the oppression I felt inwardly and it affected how I also viewed my life outwardly. The crisis of self would become a crisis of circumstance because of self fulfilling prophecies. I was like Eeyore. I couldn’t believe good for myself.
I came out of depression when my Husband one day told me, “If you believe you have to be emotional and sad before you write something good, that’s terrible. Doesn’t it mean you’ll have to always be sad?” My husband is named Ian, a version of the name John, which means ‘grace’. In fact his Mandarin name means ‘grace shines forth’. Talk about amazing grace that found me. :)
I began to encounter Jesus again, together with my husband we began to see the gospel afresh. We prayed for our loved ones to also see this grace of Jesus- i was always a Christian but only understood grace in my mid twenties. Initially, we had loved ones telling us to not pray too daring a prayer, it has to be His will. Lol. Some of these loved ones are now mighty prayer warriors who pray daring prayers too. Thank you Jesus!
Well, back to the Bell Jar illustration. Tonight as we were talking, it hit me.
When a person is in a room with windows, when they look at the glass and focus on it, they see their reflection but the surroundings are blurred. You can try this also with a camera. It’s called focal point. When we choose to focus on our pain, our disappointments, we can’t see what lies ahead. The bible says that we are MORE than conquerors in Christ, but as long as we keep our eyes on our personal reflection in the glass, we remain blinkered to that victory.
But imagine if we take our eyes off ourselves and look through the window, we focus on the horizon. Suddenly we don’t see the boundaries that bind us in. We look beyond our limitations to see how unlimited He is. It’s like when you shift focus to a focal point beyond your reflection in the glass, you will no longer see yourself but you will see the vast unlimited possibilities beyond.
We limit ourselves when we focus on ourselves.
A famous experiment in the past saw people being placed in prisons with the cell doors unlocked. The participants could leave the prison anytime yet mired by disbelief, they didn’t even try to open the gates to step out.
That’s what our personal fears and limitations do to us- they prevent us from stepping out of our comfort zones. A comfort zone doesn’t always bring comfort. It is just a comfort zone because it is familiar. Sometimes being depressed becomes a habit of thought, the norm and so it becomes a comfort zone.
So how does one step out of that comfort zone?
First see how big He is, and how small your problem is.
My favourite exercise when I feel overwhelmed? I think about how vast the universe is, and then I picture the LORD who created it pinpointing on me and then my problem & suddenly my problem is microscopic, a nano issue to Him. I settle my eye gate.
Then I check my mouth gate. I praise and worship because when I praise Him, I am declaring my victory in spite of my situation. I watch what I say not to be legalistic, but to speak the good I want to see in my life. Planting my seed in His faithfulness. If I fail and speak out of line, i declare I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus unto victory. No guilt and condemnation weeds will prevent seeds of faith from taking root n sprouting.
Then I check my ear gate, faith comes from hearing and hearing the Word of Christos. I aim to tune my ears to the good stuff, to His promises of good in my life. When I hear right, I let the right words in to shape my thoughts and emotions.
Then I remember that Jesus is the fragrance that brings the LORD joy for me. And I breathe that joy in and breathe out my anxieties. And I am strengthened.
Each step with my listening, my seeing, my talking, my breathing in takes me far beyond the invisible Bell Jar that tries to bind me to all the limitations that I imagined out because of my fears and anxieties.
The man by the pool of Bethesda was asked if he wanted to be healed because he had an excuse for living in the season of defeat and despair- it is called self pity. One of my pastors brought me to see something I hadn’t seen before. He was asked if he wants to be healed because it means stepping out one’s comfort zone. It means beginning to work again (not legalistic work but good honest work), it means taking steps you don’t even know you can take.
Today I am free of that Bell Jar because I changed my focal points, because I decided to take steps out of my comfort zone knowing that when i look down to check out the footprints that there is just one set because He is carrying me.
A dear friend made it simple for me one day. I was anxious about my eldest boy and she asked me, “Do you trust Jesus?” “Yes.” “Okay, so if you trust Jesus then don’t worry.” So I decided there and then to take on an Alfred W Newman slogan for my own, “What me worry?”
He is therefore I am. He is not confined by impossibilities or Bell Jars, neither am I. We must not just step physically out of Egypt, we also need to step out of mental and emotional Egypt. He who is made free is free indeed.
And thus, I stepped out of the Bell Jar.

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Masuk Angin

Can't help but share this!!! *pegangan laptop*

I experienced this TWICE in this month.

Oke jadi begini..

Udah dua kali gue mengalami gejala masuk angin. Kepala pusing dan terasa menekan, temperatur badan lebih rendah, badan lemes, mata berat. Rasanya ngantuk tapi badan dan mata ga bisa diajak tidur. Gue pribadi juga sebenarnya ga gitu suka tidur siang, karena rasanya agak bersalah dengan hari yang dihabiskan dengan tidur. Mending baca ampe mabok dibandingkan tidur sampe muntah *lebay*

Gejala masuk angin ini biasanya diawali dengan kurang tidur. Oke gue tau kurang tidur emang jadi penyebab masuk angin. Tapi di dua kasus masuk angin yang gue alami ini agak sedikit berbeda. Kali pertama gue udah tidur selama 5 jam (lumayan kan 5 jam?) dan emang saat itu gue bangun lebih pagi untuk keluar kota (mungkin badan jadi gampang capek). Kali kedua ini gue udah tidur 6.5 jam (which is halo.. 0.5 jam lagi udah 7 jam!) dan kebangun karena kebelet pee yang kemudian masih leyeh-leyeh dengerin sermon pagi (nyantai kan?).

Di dua kondisi itu, gue tidur lebih dari 3-4 jam. 5 jam okelah ya. Dan 6.5 jam? Cukuplah.
Tapi kenapa gue masuk angiiin?

Gue zebel karena sebenarnya penyebabnya hanya karena kurang tidur yang ga kurang-kurang amat. Tidur 5-6 jam itu udah lumayan banget, dan apalagi di kali kedua gue masih nyantai di tempat tidur, tapi tetep aja masuk angin.

Yang pertama
Di kali pertama saat gue masuk angin di luar kota (sebut saja Bandung) bener-bener sangat merusak rencana. Karena cuman bisa 2 hari di Bandung, kedua hari itu menjadi sangat berharga untuk bisa kesana kemari.

Gue inget banget, saat itu saking udah ga kuatnya, gue memutuskan untuk ke kosan sebentar dengan pikiran tidur adalah obat yang terbaik! Nyampe di kosan, berbenah sebentar (sambil menyiapkan laptop untuk download wgwg) dan mencoba untuk tidur. Mata udah merem, tapi otak masih jalan. GRAAA. Buat tidur siang aja gabisaa KZL.

Di tempat tidur sempat terpikir untuk keluar kosan beli tolak angin, tapi kepala ini pusingnyaaaaa. Berat banget sampe melek aja susah, apalagi beranjak keluar lagi dan beli tolak angin? Ga kuat.

Desperate.

Ketika gue lagi terbaring di kamar kosan *lebay tapi iya* gue mendadak keinget 1 FT tentang speaking in tongues. Gue keingetan 1 ayat kalo berbahasa roh itu membangun diri. Diri ini ga cuman bicara roh, tapi juga jiwa dan tubuh. Ada dorongan dari roh gue untuk berbahasa roh, dan berbahasa roh lah gue. 

1 Kor 14:4.. Siapa yang berkata-kata dengan bahasa roh, ia membangun dirinya sendiri
1 Cor 14:4.. He who speaks in a tongue edifies himself

Gue ga ngerti gue ngomong apa, dan gue ga peduli juga gue ngomong apa. Gue percaya Roh Kudus berdoa dengan keluhan-keluhan yang tak terucapkan dan lebih tepat sasaran dibanding gue sendiri berdoa dengan pikiran gue.

Roma 8:26-27.. Demikian juga Roh membantu kita dalam kelemahan kita; sebab kita tidak tahu, bagaimana sebenarnya harus berdoa tetapi Roh sendiri berdoa untuk kita kepada Allah dengan keluhan-keluhan yang tidak terucapkan. Dan Allah yang menyelidiki hati nurani, mengetahui maksud Roh itu..

Setelah berbahasa roh selama 1-2 menit.. jeng jeng! Gue masih terbaring #eaa
Dan setelah gue bangun....

God is my witness: the headache was gone!

Gue terpana. Serius.
Gue ga menyangka (akhirnya) gue mengalami kesembuhan yang terjadi dengan instan.

Wow 
Wow 
Wow

Ini seriusan?
Beneran?
Sembuh?
Ciyusan apah?

Masih kagak percaya.

Beres sakit kepala yang menghilang begitu saja, gue kemudian bergegas keluar kosan melakukan seluruh rencana yang udah disiapkan untuk hari itu.

And God is my witness: Sampe malem pun udah ga kerasa sakit kepala (dan bahkan gejala masuk angin yg lain) sama sekali!

Bahkan di hari itu gue sempet keliling-keliling toko buku yang which is klo sakit kepala itu masih ada, gue ga akan mungkin kuat. Tapi faktanya, semua gejala hilang begitu aja buff!

Wow.

I thank God for His words are so true!

Yang Kedua
Di waktu yang kedua, lagi-lagi gue masuk angin. Tapi yang ini lanjut besok aja haha.
Stay tuned!

We're Chosen as His Mine

Chosen As Mine 
Hillsong



Here I am so close to you
Know My voice, I'll never leave you
For I have loved you since before
The sands of time were made

I love you still and always will
You're chosen as Mine

My Father wants to bless you now
Receive from Him all that you'll ever need
Come spend eternity with Me
My hearts full of love for you

I love you still and always will
You're chosen as Mine

Cries in the desert, My child I hear them
Tears in the valley, My lovely I count them
You're so precious, you were on My mind as I died

Here I am so close to you
Know My voice, I'll never leave you
For I have loved you since before
The sands of time were made

I love you still and always will
You're chosen as Mine

Cries in the desert, My child, I hear them
Tears in the valley, My lovely, I count them
You're so precious, you were on My mind as I died

I love you still, always will
You're chosen as Mine

I love you, I love you
Oh, yes I do